Category Archives: Riffing

A good job of work

What’s a job you would like to do for just one day?

Our neighbor, George Plimpton, famously did some very odd jobs just once.

He was a Detroit Lion for a game in 1963 and the goalie for the Boston Bruins. He pitched during batting practice in the 1960 All-Star Game and sparred with Archie Moore in 1959.

I always admired not just his skills as a raconteur but also the fire in his soul. I never envied his choices of “work,” although it was all done in the spirit of journalism.

In a more direct answer to your question: Most any job would be tolerable for a day. Is there any one job I would particularly want to have for just one day?

Pilot on the air shuttle to Nantucket comes to mind. Just once and preferably in calm skies.

Best Stuff

What are your favorite brands and why?

Brands are meant to be a bit clubby. The seller has invited us to be part of, for example, the Rolex family or the Ralph Lauren gang. We’ve bought in.

My favorite brands are nothing so heady as these or Tiffany’s or Baccarat.

I used to get a kick out of the Levi’s brand [maiden name], and there’s nothing like a personal connection to make a brand feel special. Full disclosure I generally wore the Wrangler blue jeans brand back in the day. Now, I am consigned to NYDJ.

I prefer Kelloggs cereals and would not trade their Raisin Bran for any other. Noosa makes a better yogurt than Dannon or Chobani. Naked Juice sells a pre-made smoothie as good as the specially blended ones I used to enjoy.

For cleaning supplies, I favor Method and Swiffer is tops.

Folktales

Recently, I started wondering whence those picturesque expressions we’ve all heard originated.

Well, of course, something like madder than a wet hen has to have country roots. We city dwellers wouldn’t know a wet hen from a dry one. We also wouldn’t have any idea how angry being wet would make her.

These little bits of the vernacular can make your speech more colorful and colorful language makes conversation more entertaining.

I have favorite colloquialisms, of course, but I’ll be gobsmacked if I understand where they came from.

Some are just cute as a button. Others are cumbersome. As? What? I don’t know a slangy comparison for that one.

Unwieldy as a tractor on a mountain top? Is a tractor that uncomfortable with heights?

Familiarity with animal husbandry or just animal psychology does enter into some of these choices. You’re as hungry as a bear. Then there’s “as cunning as a fox.” How about ‘as persnickety as a porcupine’?

The argument or assumption that this flavorful language has a Southern connection may stem from too many episodes of Designing Women. Idioms come from all over.

Sometimes, the really clever raconteur adds another component, doubling up on the metaphoric. The analogy can become more specific if s/he says, “as cunning as a fox with a PhD.”

Why can’t word-play be more urban than rural? “She’s as twisty as Columbus Circle” may not be sheer poetry, but it’s my start. “He’s tracking farther than the A train?”

“He wears so many hats that he’s Fifth Avenue on Easter Sunday.”

I have to admit I am on the fence about most of the little similes I just built.

I wish I could say my linguistic alterations made me feel as cozy as two peas in a pod

Celebrating

What is your favorite holiday? Why is it your favorite?

With Cinco de Mayo close on the horizon, this prompt is an exercise begging for a single answer. I am fickle, like Ado Annie: if I’m not near the holiday I love…”

Honestly, I know that as Americans we are fond of our holidays. One of the places I used to frequent would always announce its next closure with utter glee well in advance of the holiday.

There are all those “make-believe” celebrations like National Pizza Day to honor. Your local pizza parlor should definitely stay open for that one!

I think I am most drawn to the made-up International Coffee Drinkers Day. I celebrate this one just about every morning and sometimes when I hit the coffee trail.

Going to the post

There is something about getting mail- and giving mail- that puts a little bounce in the step.

Observing a woman on her way to drop a package at the post office reminded me of this simple pleasure.

When I was a teen, I remember mailing figs to my grandfather who lived in Israel. I thought it ridiculous to send figs or dates to the Middle East, but packing the dry fruits and taking them to the post office was fun.

When your neighbor says “ah no mail; at least I didn’t get a bill,” you nod in understanding. But you are both a little disappointed at the empty mailbox.

Street furnishings

There was a time when I could furnish an apartment with stuff I found on the street.

Not now. My taste has, shall we say, evolved. In short, it’s better than other’s “what were we thinking” discards.

I did find a shelf that once properly installed was a sturdy staple in our bathroom for years.

I was sitting on the bench typing away as is my wont when a fellow traveler asked if I was taking it. My new friend had already picked up the tray table.

I said no, I will give it to you.

You can’t guess how delighted he was with his windfall.

As the saying goes, one man’s no thanks is another’s treasure.